Practical Jokes

Paramedics have alot of time on their hands while at work… okay, sometimes too much time on their hands…. and like all people with too much time on their hands they find useless, silly, and often quite dangerous ways of wasting such time… this page is dedicated to the wonderful practical jokes that I have been witness to, partaken in or heard about in my time as a paramedic.

Practical Joke 1.

In stations where there are bunk beds – attach a bag of fluids to a giving set to the underside of the top bunk (hartmans or any other clear liquid shall do just fine). Everytime the person on the top rolls over, pressure should reach the fluid bag and cause a little bit of fluid to dribble off the bed onto the person below. As the person below wakes up to explore where they are getting wet – the person on top may wish to get up, and get up and quickly run to the bathroom…

Practical Joke 2.

Using lignocaine gel onto the door handle of the ambulance so that the other paramedic slips while opening the door – alternatives to this are using lignocaine gel onto the handle of the phone and then calling the phone.. this is very messy, and not all that funny after the first time.

Practical Joke 3

Moving cars – this is always fun. I worked in a bad area a few years ago, and it was normal custom to move your cars from the outside car park to the inside of the Ambulance Bay at night – one night a friend of mine got stuck out on a case before she had time to take her car in. While she was out, we found her keys and moved her car up the street. The possible down side to this… is the potential for the car to actually then get stolen, leading to a world of embarrassment and justifications…

Practical Joke 4

An alternative to moving cars, includes using bricks to support the weight of the car and then removing the tyres from the car – downside to this – its a lot of work!

Practical Joke 5

Get someone to hide in a body bag, while another paramedic explains to the first paramedic that they’ve just attended the worst “burns” patient who has now died and you are taking up to the hospital. Then suggest that they “have to” see the interesting way the patient ended up burnt. While the first paramedic opens up the body bag, the other paramedic (laying still in the body bag) can sit up and say “I’m not dead yet…” – possible down side: paramedic being tricked may assume the person in the body bag is a demon and kill him…

Practical Joke 6

During the middle of the night, while you’re already out on an emergency, or after an emergency, call the Station Phone and say that you have a cardiac arrest… by the time they jump up and call on the radio that they are responding – the despatcher will ask them what they are talking about? – If you’re really mean, you can then call back five minutes later when you think they have gone back to sleep, and say “Sorry, we had a mistake before, the cardiac arrest is at … such and such location…” – downside – the paramedics on the job wont actually answer the phone or listen the next time the get called to a cardiac arrest.

Practical Joke 7

If someone is a bit of a practical joker, but is always careful to look after everything they have by locking it in their locker… one day, while he or she is out on a job, come in (maybe even on a day off work) and cut the padlock with a pair of bolt cutters, and then brick up the inside of the locker… this becomes even more funny, afterwards, when he or she decides the jokes over, and just wants their keys for their car – so they can drive home. Downside to this is that he or she may actually kill you after you own up to it…